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| YUGO |
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YUGO LABS |
| ALSO WIK |
| GOLDEN OMEN 2 | |
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Itself emerged from Mauve Julius HQ, confident stride undermined by a parasitical weakness which soon reduced It to crippled pile of soon to be cadavers. Considering the season, a positive forecast had been bestowed upon the shire, but around Itself was inside a localised torrential downpour. Early in the day the maiden had given light as a prophecy, a glorious ember in the dying night. It brought colour into the park like the visible spectrum had just exploded in a great expansion of consciousness. Hope had shone again in the hallowed wastelands. Itself thought upon the workings of the long obsolete religions, complete one way devotion, blindly, despite rational thought. The followers loved the deity. This love was absolute even when entire civilizations were destroyed without warning, or explanation. Instructions were received, some of which were absorbed by followers in proximity. These followers were strict followers of the shire's meticulous etiquette and would never directly question a riddle from the maiden. The dark night continued, inside it rained, the intensity of the storm only exacerbated by increasingly maniacal messages albeit convincingly delivered. Moments of doubt were sensed and swiftly reprimanded by serpentine decelerations. Through watery vision the spectre of Itself continued its sullen journey, a great burden pressed amongst Its chest. The night was still, not a soul in sight, chess algorithms and profit margins suddenly seemed materialistic, the prophecy was all that mattered and all that needed to be processed no matter the cost. The ground started to shake, the maiden had not come out of the trance soon enough. Suddenly the humidity in the air around was dried out instantly as the world started to burn. Itself welcomed death. |
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| Posted by Mahjong The Wisest @ 2015-12-11 02:30:12 | |
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| GOLDEN OMEN 1 | |
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Amongst the cold morning were feelings of extreme distaste. The maiden who proclaimed many a criticism was gone, such verbose diatribe could be a contributing factor. So yeah in this book everything is gone, but maybe actually nothing is gone. Hold on I'm speaking normally let me revert to pseudo intellectual bullshit. Oh sorry, apparently that was already turned on let me turn that off and then correct a pigeon amongst peers. It was a cold ominous morning, but it was july, and people wondered strongly if It might be june. A sound uttered amongst the dawn chorus, so earth shattering that it reverberated the air itself. Sonic disturbances oscillated, rolling into frequencies not previously heard by any Neosapien. It awoke. It had held his people close to him, this was to become a downfall. At first It felt a great sadness, loss of unfathomable magnitude. Whilst pondering if Itself was an itself, the writer tapped away in the smoky attic, prophetically unwinding his own demise. Thy heart amongst thee is banished, great envy amongst thy newly accepted vagabonds. It had been misunderstood, a creature formed of crystal and stone. A beast, a triumph and a tragedy. Itself continued into the hazy landscape that could have been but is not quite. 'Hypothetically a thesaurus could help with such an endeavour amongst people expecting sentences': Thoughts like this were generally dismissed and thrown into a pile amongst severed arteries. An infant screamed out, piercing the air with the kind of frequency humans were most sensitive to. It was the baby that would later be called Jesus. He was an OK kid but to be honest the miracle stuff is all bullshit, mild coincidence at best. My own infant came suddenly, the wife progressed from about 4-9 months in what would be considered 2 earth weeks. This was a couple of weeks after Jesus, I feel a little bit overshadowed if I'm honest.. and who wants to be born in the year zero. I talked to a man that showed up in our flat (our flat was basically a stable and people used to mistake it whilst storing horses) who told me of the tale of the Golden Omen. If one were to posses said artefact it would restore past loves and heal all open emotional wounds. Naturally Itself was keen to seek such a infamous treasure, a unfounded relief. There was only one man to go to. Itself found itself in the offices of Mauve Julius Ltd, looking for a step up in the detective ladder. Broads were piling up with their ear to the stone, absorbing word after word of exquisite wisdom on domestic abhorrence. I shift my hat to the side and glance over at Itself, I will be gone from here soon.. a mere pixel or speck on the canvas of space. Itself snatches a ticket and waits, a sublime patience emitted from the act itself. 'Y'dont speak easy do ya?' the presumed receptionist called. 'Why no I-' Itself proclaimed before stumbling into a large filing cabinet. After a bemused look from the secretary Itself was startled by a moth that had escape from a nearby file, as first impressions go Itself was not on great terms with the help. |
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| Posted by Mahjong The Wisest @ 2015-12-07 04:38:35 | |
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| tonearm robbery | |
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the accents on this beat are no accident; they infringe on my client's bank account. indeed, in his puportedly original track "bankfone2," this richard d. james (if that is his real name) has made himself the alexander grahmn bell of the ball to the elisha gray of a cherished, bonded, and certified riced out records artist. as you can clearly see on the internet, here, the track is largely constructed with sampled waveflams from "the welsh chef" (penned by none other than juke highbert himself!) and topped with crouton-sized chunks of the blade techno opener (penned by the studio techs responsible for preventing new order from making a mess, and/or cleaning up their mess in the event that new order should, indeed, make a mess). this has caused my clients -- riced out juke and highbert records -- significant damage to bankroll, disposition, and all eyebrows involved. the flagrant lifts hoisted with the pnumatic bluster of a pensive ginger, using his fame, there, to foment accidents that are not accidents, but note accidents, to the stemuegan phloe of a highly parallel record label, an artist it grover, and eyebrows, via a shameless beatnik. if we let this stand, how can we sit at the same table with ourselves? this richard d. james (if that his his real name) must be made an example of -- and not just because it is deserved, but because it is the law.
your honor, it is a clear case of tonearm robbery. Exhibit A: here Exhibit B: there |
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2015-11-18 23:09:49 | |
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| life over RJ11 | |
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Remember that time pnrfne hit the pope with a pencil and he was all wtf then .5 got involved and HYPERFIKBOY DIED. after that bob Dobbs put up some drywall with a stable dozer. There were a good 4 balls in the forum but the nuns had no laser Vision. dirigibles were all the rage down by the funt factory where Artie made a bird lamp. mahjongggg took a screencap. nobody knew a yugo could be SO incorrigible or how much hentai ED4 watched in a watasecond. heaferimg had a GIF in the pamcrack. bjork never sounded so off kilter as the day that voice was shaved to the masses like a Sony mini disk only release. APHEX TWIN IS RICHARD D. JAMES APHEX TWIN IS RICHARD D. JAMES APHEX TWIN IS RICHARD D. JAMES APHEX TWIN IS RICHARD D. JAMES APHEX TWIN IS RICHARD D. JAMES APHEX TWIN IS RICHARD D. JAMES APHEX TWIN IS RICHARD D. JAMES APHEX TWIN IS RICHARD D. JAMES APHEX TWIN IS AN ANTIQUE RINGTONE |
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| Posted by shitbowl @ 2015-11-03 01:28:42 | |
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| un-reredacted memo | |
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with my windows redacted and my LP5 splayin' i was tryna pass taxes but subcontractas to the maxes so i redact da redactas and engage da tractas. fright might at nidmite university please don't steal my eyes. your internet won't like it, but your insane will love it. |
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2015-10-26 07:27:08 | |
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| Pizza all up in this | |
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Thin tomato cheese. fat spiced meat. Pizza is everywhere in this bitch. Just look around and see the pie. |
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| Posted by wolf530 (analog hacker extraordinaire) @ 2015-09-29 18:56:08 | |
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| i dont spwak scottish | |
| A day early and a dollar short. | |
| Posted by shitbowl @ 2015-09-15 11:20:07 | |
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| stairs you must go down | |
| the members of the set "stairs you must go down" include "all the stairs in your house," amongst other stairs. like, if you throw some theoretical stair situation at me, and you are reasonably proximal to throwing yourself down the stairs, chances are those stairs are also likely a memember of the aforementioned set. | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2015-09-09 04:15:08 | |
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| asd a lawyer | |
| a lawyer who won court cases caused trouble. he represented bards. didn't think modern problems wer modern did you? my ansestor was a little man withred hair. to own property and trading companies like The Norse Dis, the irish allowed female officers in the national army in 300BC and her name was terri zucchinni and female cops and females the same rights as males | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2015-08-16 00:10:04 | |
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| there's no excuse for you | |
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"I have nine cats," the man said apologetically, as if it would defuse the awkwardness of the situation.
"I should hope so!" I said, implying that it didn't. There was no excuse for buying that much cat food, with that many $5 Target gift cards. This oozed out of my intonation, making it crystal clear that, while he had utterly failed to explain himself, I did marginally appreciate the attempt |
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2015-08-11 22:41:50 | |
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| Quantum foosball | |
| HET THE FUC[£~K OFF <> my ANd!¥_ tdhE HAT you rose iN ONg!! | |
| Posted by shitbowl @ 2015-07-07 23:12:34 | |
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| solstice is the best chiptune | |
| St Bride's bannock for spring (February 1), Bealtaine bannock for summer (May 1), Lughnasadh or Lammas bannock for autumn harvests (August 1), and Samhain bannock for winter (end of October). Other special Scottish and Gaelic bannocks include beremeal bannock, bride's bannock, cod liver bannock, cryin' bannock, fallaid bannock, fife bannock, Hogmanay bannock, Marymas bannock, mashlum bannock, Michaelmas Bannock, pease bannock, Pitcaithly bannock, salt bannock, sautie bannock, Silverweed bannock, St Columba's bannock, teethin' bannock, Yetholm bannock, and Yule bannock. In the north of England, bannocks are often made using pastry rather than a bread dough. | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2015-06-22 03:00:47 | |
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| CSI: OMG | |
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UUUUUUUUUUUU My name is Hammermill Hayley. I was a victim of Spider-Chimes. PPPPPPPPPPP Like you, I used social networks. I even kept the confidential ASCII of my demoscene (warez) krew on my botnet. WWWWW Then, I turned into mix of a buick and a golden retriever. NNNN Now, i work for DDD by margaret thatcher of febreeze krew. |
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2015-06-21 19:04:44 | |
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| bummer, yo. | |
| 4-tone retropwn with the bodice paste, king james firmware 3.02b (a.k.a. the rom chip with the biltmore sticker). tatterings serve tea on the ePCI and raid-6 was ballin' beyond acceptable limits when the pacman up in the arch was all WAAAH with the video for lunatics and then the multilib was all CANNOT FIND 32.BUTTS.LIB.SO and when i finally got it going the mantis tore my ship up within five minutes | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2015-06-21 18:30:53 | |
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| he who hunts the wumpus hunter | |
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hunt the wumpus is, in all likelihood, a bit of heartless mockery programmed into our reality by the beings running this infernal simulation; analogous to how a human master will provide his dog with a squeaky toy shaped like a t-bone steak. the dog appreciates the toy simply for the visceral experience of chomping on it, and is incapable of comprehending that its shape represents an ironic reference to a vastly superior experience; an experience the master withholds from all canines as a matter of policy. "Awww, he thinks he's people!" the master exclaims with a laugh, before resuming his efforts to port hunt the wumpus to a slightly different flavor of UNIX.
"the poor oblivious bastard," the dog thinks to himself, "always pressing the buttons on that thing when he could be chomping on a chew toy." |
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2015-05-31 11:52:26 | |
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| y³ | |
squoshlit helgoltic hurbalbus turbalvis borthulta hulbipput urpithola ulpathtup rupiludat ulpcotnuk epumbinat vutnoctup zopkotkin orplatmip hursbolpy epifmiqak hapgatkip niholptic yotpozack urspiptup wobnoscus thulpapto juqwitoxi dupganfep centebalt ilthuqwip urplspupt yaxcacker zonthipup athiglapt glathigek thaxiporg |
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| Posted by Atomdrache @ 2015-05-07 14:39:45 | |
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| wtf is a yoga pants | |
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| Posted by shitbowl @ 2015-04-30 22:53:16 | |
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| transcript | |
| My name is full OSHA Alicia O'Brien. Originally from Russia delivers. I wasn't out there are now is home. From often hinge and or oil from half an inch. How's that they need. Found by a police officer and shape. When my mom just slapped me on the street and walked away. If it wasn't a police officer Alan and didn't bill I. Come in no way I'm just so happy when I have now. Where I wish. Kids over there how this experiences mind. Just giving my fourth marathon. She really coach. Race against the top racers. Craig from that's fine insulin take me out really go. Do change. Craig is. A stage director. Of dust bunnies and he is my friend that I like to run when. That's finest and me is. One of the best programs out there in there world finds a job. That also makes showed you know I can job. The one employee anyway that you don't want him. May understand where he's coming from who. The nonjudgmental. Until they don't want there is no you can't do that under this. I want the world to know 11 wins grave and Dylan was just. The world and there was. We want them to know I'm not chilly feel bad. Because they can. He didn't do it. You know make entire way. pfft, yog | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2015-04-22 21:38:16 | |
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| the past & links to most of the rest | |
| I posted up a shitload of Flippers in the past & links to most of the rest -- So unreleased material & alternate versions. THE COLORS ARE VERY GOOD...THESE ARE GETTING VERY VERY HARD TO FIND AND VERY EXPENSIVE..CRIMPED CORNERS...AS USUAL....76-year-old salesman "Diamond" Jimmy Roy has sold everything from used cars to antiques to jewelery. I HOPE TO BOND WITH A LARGE AMOUNT OF IOWA CO-LATERAL BONDS SO JOIN ME IN PRAISE OF SPACE. It's a story about a guy who's been locked up for doing the most American activity possible | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2015-04-22 20:49:33 | |
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| politics 'n shit | |
| The board of .7 officially nominates Hickory Dinton for politics. Dinton is all up in that politics. Dinton owns only dry clean only politics wear. Dinton IS politics. Politics politics politics piklfs poligv pokgxshybcs pljgv polugvrixs lhugdsis polyg cd sc pilaf pu kk hcjdcpolihfc H%(0)%p po£{~gicds. | |
| Posted by shitbowl @ 2015-04-15 22:54:28 | |
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