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| YUGO |
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YUGO LABS |
| ALSO WIK |
| An equation for beans | |
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» dance like you're selling turkey bums « defenestrated sandwitches » turn donw teh mood lightimngz « turkey bum daddy » I'll eat your face « kiki made a turkey bum widget » mo0ngliuowF « cheese is no longer healfthy » filthyh, filthy, filthye. = |
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| Posted by shitbowl @ 2010-07-11 21:08:00 | |
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| madam, do you realize your sign is a tautology? | |
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-07-10 18:22:00 | |
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| song sangst 2self | |
| heyyywhatchu gotchu ghotchu hey dunna wai bodgubodgi (batta) hey swinga dudu clinga berry margaritaville DUN hey gouda slam dat poota dunna HEY buddy whoa there nelly belly | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-07-10 02:35:00 | |
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| Talk Shit | |
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shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk shit talk shittalk shittalker talkershit talk shit talk |
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-07-08 12:46:00 | |
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| laboratory log | |
| the sophisticated hesitatings of my heavily-parallized neoprocessor were proving insufficient to presume more than eighty nectares per liter. this would not do at all. this was all because i'd had the tuna for lunch? why did i have the tuna for lunch. i NEVER have the tuna for lunch. someone was behind this anomaly, i knew it. it had been bothering me all day, and here it was again, coming to a head as my grant money was very and truly on the line. i suppose i'll have to compromise, and put laxatives in the soft-serve machine again. that usually causes a few missed appointments during application week. not the most sophisticated technique, but it IS allowed by the geneva conventions -- as a scholar, i must hold myself to standards. not necessarily high ones, though, they just have to be there. as i drive a standard station wagon, i consider myself covered in this regard. in any case, back to lunch -- this was all starting to smell like the scone incident of 2007, which caused me to mistakenly unleash over 30 kilotons of blueberry pie into the upper atmosphere. to this day, my reputation has STILL not recovered, and i suspected this to be an attempt to put the final nail in the coffin of my career. if this were indeed what it was, i knew who would be behind it: Randall Banister. that dastard, he nuzzled my scone. | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-07-08 12:18:00 | |
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| reality can be very pointy! | |
| and also full of earwigs of the rarest variety, in the kitchen found straw upon the cleaning, of all things. o fuckwq!~ cant trash this. deserves specislal tretment. plaec on ground. STOMP! ok, now you can has garbage can. another bug for the victoryt of mankind. do you have keebler elves in your house? | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-07-06 18:55:00 | |
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| We Are Currently Experiencing A Diachronic Orthagonality | |
| citizens are advised to be the alert for exquisite savings and extreme tastes, cleared only for the zionistic hobgoblinOB NOM NOMD NOFSDFNds YES YES HURHURRR hURURRR NOM CHOMP EAT and a paisly green o'erveure. | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-07-04 17:55:00 | |
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| FATE | |
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-07-02 17:19:00 | |
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| Poke | |
| j wowojek there is very little to apprehend the rabbit patch. The big toad has left the biudling. Hon when the hickle gets the grof. Jump when it eats the pickle,. You must listen to wahts I say. THis is erelvent. This is wahat I acame here for. | |
| Posted by Pet'ctlyptem Xon Yihaa'qti WchwaaXaan @ 2010-06-27 02:03:00 | |
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| WHY USE LOTION WHEN GOD GAVE US MACKREL? | |
| i find myself with sizzyechuan again and a somewhat more organized mind (just a small somewhat, mind you). then it circumnavigated my dome: why use lotion, when god gave us mackrel? this profound logical connection has stirred up deep feelings from within me, but i'm not exactly sure what it means. the szeuchacuan is not telling me, and i just splashed it anyways. thank goodness it did not get on my computing machine!! there is a house with snow in the background. it looks like a pleasant enough place to live. maybe i will spot it on my travels next week. i would knock on the door and be like, hey ya, i saw your house on riced out yugo. then they'd call the cops. not everyone appreciates the yugo. | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-06-26 14:30:00 | |
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| pardon me but i have szechuan for milk??? | |
| pardon me but my szechuan fpor milk? it is milky? i clamboured overe here to say: parton my bourde? these things are milky. semen. oven mitt rape. hjeususconstitutionakl sponge. wtf mang, im so ripe. has helvert done cad? mit mine mo no de no do so largy chocky pocky wocky winga wingang iwjawj and i meant to ttype wyunga wunga all alojg. this si logic work on hatplane. would you float my boat? of course you would. you are a good lad. you mean wrell. but yoju have fart. for this,m the constitution cries pies. teary bleary. rambo gumbo. electric sid shifuyfle. kernuat. star of david. | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-06-19 10:41:00 | |
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| borging on creatinin levels | |
| shfufuflele the silverfish for the scrooll weel just altered the situairon. enviorne taggarts asdopsa[. stop turning god damng these keyes. thjey are conspiring agfainst me. i fear my ability eto emit pudding in advacnece of the tactics of the king. htere are 46t reasons to left or right but i have none for you. there are otherwelse elveis u[pupnf under the choose larsde but can i not think nork? indeed, luigi has sausage for me. thankfully the plannned acutalit of sdm is ejrlkeslkfds . i think i willl turn the ac back on before continue. ok shes on., nmy fingers, they fidger. what is soultiuonhklsdf/LSD ? keys are tupie . skd;lf ica nt' lksjdfk just nkisl hwiosjdfoi jdsgodamnndf | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-06-19 10:31:00 | |
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| whistlebuttuhunh | |
| whitelsbuttelius sd;lfsd;f [p tschus tidlius naroleptic. halp these keys feel weird. alien to me. i am going to send out a permkit for normal keyboard operatoion. the lady will fille my frequset withj the basest of ease as ytecho blares from my hedphones. can capitalism complete this sentenece? apparently so, but it cannot s;pell. whatwhjith forth for upon noughat my doi me mang. i seriojusyly got it. i'v hjac carving a shelf. it's ptoato toakf pak tchooe. u noe?> cos eyedew. smell of dad. | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-06-19 10:07:00 | |
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| 2 half-eaten sundaes equal 1 full-on sundae | |
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| Posted by shitbowl @ 2010-06-18 20:56:00 | |
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| Good Old Fashioned Laser Warfare | |
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Relax, You've got ol' Francois by your Side. That's Right Mister. Only the Finest quality for you. We really mean it. Welcome to Deslaw Interchange, where you get More Bang for your Cred. So what will be your Pleasure this evening, my Friend? We have everything from Fine Housewares to Refined Shambanian Wax to Splatch. And what a Discount too. What do you say, My Friend? |
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| Posted by wolf530 (analog hacker extraordinaire) @ 2010-06-18 01:43:00 | |
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| They Called Him Autobahn McSnazzy | |
| They called him Autobahn McSnazzy, and he lightfingered my lunchtime burrito before I even laid eyes on him. My frontal lobes floated the option that it was a mere misunderstanding, but my stomach was growling for blood (or perhaps pizza; its vocabulary is somewhat limited and it struggles to express itself). I managed to scrape by on little pieces of paper and sugar packets, then confronted him the next day. Sir, you ate my burrito. I was forced to resort to drastic measures. But the dastard offered no apology. He merely said, "VHY DU U LEAVE BURRITO IF NOT FOR EAT?" I got the impression it was not so much a misunderstanding as it was an attempt to pass a deliberate crime off as a misunderstanding. I scowled, said nothing, and wandered off pondering my revenge. Things anyone leaves are game to eat, huh? So, when he slipped out to use the can, I ate his mousepad. I mean, why did he leave it there, if not for eat? Upon his return, he seemed confused, and unable to connect my pilfered burrito with his missing Pamela Anderson mousepad. All was going according to plan. When he slipped out for a cigarette, I ate his hat, and then his parka. Upon his return, he seemed decidedly confused and annoyed. He looked about for his missing possessions everywhere before casting a withering glance in my direction. I had the upper hand! It was time to grope the bargain. As he meandered off for more coffee, I snagged his iPod and swallowed it whole, headphones at all. Unfortunately, upon his return, the DUNT DUNT DUNT of techno emanating from my stomach made it impossible to deny responsibility. I was fired, arrested, and later sent to a psychiatric ward for six months. I still consider myself the victor in this situation. | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-06-15 13:44:00 | |
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| miscellaneous tidbits from israel | |
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To Holon And Bat Yam And The Japanese Man Chain Smoking He Was Known Only As ZEE FRONCH In The Presence Of Hasids Rocking Like Autistic Kids The Police Say: Please Cover Your Legs, Bare Knees Offend Jesus Why Is This Man Walking On His Knees? Because Christianity Is Not Only Pointlessly Ritualistic, But Also Insanely Tacky. |
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2010-06-12 06:15:00 | |
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| dongubus | |
| Hyperspace has "bumps" and "wrinkles", which can set you off course. Hyperspace, by definition being outside of rational concepts, can make your AI scared and confused and misjudge its own imputs easy--that is to say, crazy. A human will understand this is all nuts, but just deal with the problem, anyway. So in the end, your pilot is essentially momma for big, scared dog. You just got to scratch it behind its ears before it bites somebody. | |
| Posted by HYPERFUKBOT @ 2010-06-10 01:38:00 | |
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| Scott Bakula Is Down With Us | |
| The blind searchers had found a secret world inside their own mind. That different grain of sand, the library inside the single grain of sand... it taunted them from within. They could all feel the pain of the insectile parasites controlling them. They were millions searching for something that surely existed. He who could find the one grain sand different in all the desert would unlock the secrets of the last universe, laws of physics that no longer exist. These things were recorded in that single grain of sand. SINGLE GRAIN OF SINGLE GRAIN OF SINGLE GRAIN OF SINGLE GRAIN OF SINGLE GRAIN OF THE SEARCHERS THE SINGLE GRAIN THE SINGLE GRAIN THE ONE DIFFERENT GRAIN. | |
| Posted by HYPERFUKBOT @ 2010-06-09 00:44:00 | |
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| GUESS WAT!!!1 | |
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RICEDOUTYUGO is certifiably fashionable.  |
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| Posted by shitbowl @ 2010-05-29 08:07:00 | |
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