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| YUGO |
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YUGO LABS |
| ALSO WIK |
| Via analog | |
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A literary device that would be a superset of puns. Watching scrambled satellite porn is now entirely a thing of the past. In space, no one can hear you scream unless you push the transmit button. Would you do that to your comrades? |
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| Posted by wolf530 (analog hacker extraordinaire) @ 2009-12-26 05:49:00 | |
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| hashing the grid sideways | |
| giant termbulatos taxing wesley snipes to the point of prison penalties. this is the sort of thing i have to deal with on a daily basis. the shuttergate complex was strobing at a 25 degree angle, but degree in pizazz allowed me to keep typing with impunity. truly, the whit had sailed. led was ziv. ming was fing. that's the way she rollled downtown. i just press thes kese eksk in the sp[atnnerte which i was menant toosdp fdo [ erp wropas eer whp[s ]s[fps][dfp shit i'm hashing the groid/slkf;ls lskdfkdf' skapok sdoksopdfk sdoksdopk;lkds;ld;lsdsdl;ksdl;s;ldk what's up doc | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2009-12-21 12:00:00 | |
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| nipple flakes | |
| nipples dry out, flake flake, into bottle. for sale. culinary delight store shelf. you buy. you put on your spice rack. you put pan on stove, oil in pan, onions in pan. sizzzzzz goes onion. you put nipple flakes in pan. nipple flakes sizzzzz. you brown onions, nipple flakes. you add salt, pepper. you plate results. you eat onions, salt, pepper, nipple flakes. nipple flakes. you ate nipple flakes. | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2009-12-21 11:46:00 | |
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| roll a d20 on gtfo | |
roll a D20 on GTFO |
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2009-12-17 06:24:00 | |
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| im on a horse | |
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2009-12-17 04:27:00 | |
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| DAT FING MODULATION | |
| dat fing modulation, gottagetitout, gottaget it out!#!@ fuckqkqkq man teh fipsdofjlsdj ficjkl itz like fn;zdxlkfjlskd fi can't sldkfjklsd until i get teh dklfjlkd up in sherisd;l,f p;l; SHERLOCK LSD CATAPULT BLAME VALERIE HEART DEAL WITH THE DEVIL BEARCOAT TOECLIPPZING GOT POCKETZ HOT POCKETS SYMPATHETIC ;lkcvsdj;lkfmslkd f DONT FUCK NQKWE WITH F>DSKFJLK MEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeee YOU CANT FIGHT FIRE WITH TOMATOS. dat fing modandual kls fdat fingds, cant even say it, cant even say it, i can't say it, i can't say it, sdlkfjsdl;kjf;lskd f DATA FING fsdjflksd CAN'T SATY IT fkjsdlfkjsdk d dat fsdoifoas datrra msf,ds datura fing awelkfdlskd ffPKLJ DAT FING MONDUALK DAT FING WALTER MONDALE DAT skdj sdf skfjskf FINGGgg gmoduijs spokfsl;djfksd f,pdi ,pdsd fdsflkjslk mdo mspj modulus the evil doctor modulus datg sdfkljs'lksd f;slkjf;lajd dat fing modualtion sdfijsdofjpoeufusdpokjf sdkofj sd; kjfso ALMOST CAN'T SAY IT WHY CAN'T I SAY IT GOTTA SAY IT CAN'T SAY IT WON'T SAY IT COULD SAY IT WHY WHY WHY I GOTTA FIGURE IT OUTsl fjsdnkjfn sdKMdfnsm sak dTAD Lk DAT FING MODULATIOSN!# j kslmfk DAT FING MODUASKDF DAT FING SMFOASUDOI DAT FMAODNik FDATl;kdfj;lkjfslkf data disgracew kljsdlkfsd dissassemblement of the frontal V2 cortex LKSDFjlksdjf sdklf lsfkklsd fDAT FING MODULATION o shit there eye sed it. | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2009-12-16 09:06:00 | |
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| it's rewind time | |
| so there i was slamming the capitulations of eddie nougat when it was all like FING WHAM COLLAPSE. god damn, and i just got dat cardhouse antigrav. on the waLLs, the ceiling, up in the 12th woibex, also behind the couch. there was but one thing to do: rewind time. so there i was slamming the capitulations off eddie vedder when the doorbell was all like RIIING DING DONG FRER-RU ZZSCHOCKA because it had a novelty ringtone setting via computer jumpers and i simply couldn't resist the novelty bells of dorrbell england crafted by the very finest hairs of syd barrett. unfortunately, i couldn't answer the door, as i'd melted it. there was but one thing to do: rewind time. so there i was slamming the catipult of julius "iglezzzio" caesar when augustus was all liek AHAY WAT NO U MUTHAFUCKA, that claudius book was pretty boring. there was but one way to escape tedious readingz: rewind time. it's | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2009-12-16 08:59:00 | |
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| regarding modular power supplies | |
| my strickulated tromboni proved a hesitant stilton on the course canale. things such as gucci purses, handbag dogs, sideways omlette caused elevated responsilitus of the twitter. internets hemmoraboragy upon a vector of vegan deer meat multiplied by the social networking base of squadrix squarepro across the terminals of power one top of the line mutha fucka. gotta go linear 4srs. | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2009-12-10 00:02:00 | |
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| spelunktivitus | |
| patient suffered exposure to rave musics over 100liters/hr via one "ceephax acid crew." checked into the emergency with intercrainial pressure leading to spelunktivitus of the pituitary. it was mild, but we figured we could get the insurance company to spring for an MRI -- we had a new one, and i was just achin' to test it. but then things went wrong -- the patient had a socket-wrench embedded in his right shin due to a recent teleporter accident. this was not in his medical history. the wrench exploded out of his leg and jacked our new MRI. this report to be finished later; i'm needed at the goulash joint. | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2009-12-05 19:45:00 | |
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| DNSCraft | |
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DNSCraft Mac 'n' cheez cloggin up the tubes with ARTIFICIAL CHEDDERZ, illicit documentz n teh shredderz. Such is how it is at the offices of Google, what with the nerds scurrying about in a giant matrix of human-sized hamster tubes. i imagine some of them carry brightly colored spheres - Google's core source of energy -- to the reactor. Google's ion engines allow it speeds in excess of 2.4e-10mv.
Anyways, I was without a calorimiter at this crucial junxture of my experiment. My ponderings about Google's DNSCraft aside, I had to go hit up Tsutonamu Shimomura for a calorimiter. I would need electric roller blades to catch him. The electric roller blades I could only acquire from kitty... and, off we go again. |
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2009-12-03 16:38:00 | |
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| User Manual: Introduction | |
Thank you for your purchase of a HeebieWizzle 9000. Vastly superior in processing power and style to the previous generation (HeebieWizzle 900), the HeebieWizzle 9000 features 24-bit plaid processing, advanced effects algorithms, in-box cataract surgery, and dedicated watsichusett -- all in a low-emissions 2U pacakge. Tweakers rejoice to see no less than 2^6 knobs dedicated to glee modulation. Built-in vaporizer on front panel, allowing new substances to be sampled into memory for later resynthesis and demangling. Lou will occasionaly come around with his clipboard and make sure things are within spec. Some other highlights include:
No expense has been spared, and Riced Out Gear stands behind all its shit tenfold. Dizz bitch got teh warranteeez mang. See appendicitus 4 dat. thx 4 $$$ njoys!!! |
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2009-12-03 16:30:00 | |
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| a vast infitude of pleather rhombi | |
| "Where is the love in here?" I demanded. The machines, manufacturing pleather rhombi, were unresponsive. They simply continued churning out pleather rhombi, dumping them into piles. When the piles got too large, robots would scurry in and carry them off to an even bigger pile of pleather rhombi. A vast infitude of pleather rhombi. Whatever were they for? Who made this place? There was nothing around to explain any of it -- not a document, not a terminal; in fact, there weren't even any "CAUTION, DON'T STICK YOUR HAND IN HERE" signs. You know, the ones you usually see around large machines. In my six hours exploring the mysterious factory, I had not encountered a single human being. In fact, I hadn't seen a human face in a few days, as the factory was in the middle of Alaska. I wasn't even sure how the factory was powered. Room after room of dark, mysterious machines grinding out pleather rhombi. Suddenly, I felt a prick in the back of my neck. Everything started to dim... "You are with the pleather rhombi now," a voice says to me. fuck | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2009-12-03 14:45:00 | |
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| fast faddy | |
| im tellin ya -- this wont taek long. i give this bevla-squa kid five dayz fore summbuddy bring hiz azz 2 us -- fast fadd-ee. da belo-aqua. urs. da score pointz. his brutha was in this hospital. built a bill 8 pages long -- $12 4a n asprin. she just gave birth 2 ralph's coconut. | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2009-12-02 00:32:00 | |
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| exceptionally high modulus | |
| Posted by fuckle @ 2009-12-01 15:24:00 | |
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| robert anton wilson | |
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2009-11-29 22:45:00 | |
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| ...and that's when I started to get suspicious. | |
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2009-11-29 22:01:00 | |
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| sick and throwing up | |
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FIST POST yugo fax lounge THUMB DRIVE YUGONOMICON2 missing person(s) first contact THIS IS WHAT I ALWAYYYS WANTED ... sick and throwing up |
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| Posted by HYPERFUKBOT @ 2009-11-29 21:27:00 | |
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| ANTONY-O SEZ HISTORY-O | |
It's not televisionIt's the history channel |
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2009-11-28 20:41:00 | |
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| dentedketchup.gov | |
bridgitte nielsen's dog yip yip goes yip yip ocean tip yip yip wrinkly bathing suit baby blue was soproanos related before thjat also some rox and cliffs blurry lens foto wat omg apha aphafrance is teh nieslens3n4980w3urpiosdjf;kl WEEEP. eeeh. iain thinks that eeees should b puncTIOQted eeee dot eEe dot eeee dot eee EEEEE mtqhafuckqa yea EEEEEEEeeeee eee teh lettuara EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeefsdkljfhlsdkj sd;lfkjh;lksdffjsdlk fo YEA EEEEE FLAVAD KOOL AID YEKADHlksajf Eeeeeeeeeeeeee fs;ldkjf;lkd EEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeEEEEEE, |
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2009-11-27 19:09:00 | |
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| Autotrombic McTrickulation | |
| Patient presented with signs of Autotrombic McTrickulation all about the anterior snout. Prognosis was grim, his car needed a new starter. A new starter was, luckily, available from the donor list, and we even had time to stop for donuts on the way back. It's the sort of day that you go to med school for -- fresh and full of fish, parsley, and goliath. Really, though, I wasn't happy. Drat that troublesome incident from my past. You know the one -- years ago, I saw a music video via one "snoop dawg." It featured a Bently Automobile at an unnatural angle. It instructed me to drop it like it's hot. Since then, I've been unable to face microwave pizza. I'd seek help, but I fear I could lose my medical license if word got out. Then I couldn't serve medicine at my bar. I'd have to move to Oregon. Rent a house shaped like a Pentagon. Play dungeons & dragons. Achieve coitus with vacant supermodels. Wait, where was I again? | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2009-11-27 12:06:00 | |
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