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| YUGO |
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YUGO LABS |
| ALSO WIK |
| STERLING NESBITT | ||
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2006-01-26 03:57:00 | ||
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| crunk-matrix.biz | |
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o hi
watup u losin ur mind??1/31//? o noe u noe u n 4 trbl |
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2006-01-25 22:07:00 | |
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| this is your captain speaking | |
| this post will be written eventually, please check back regularly for developments | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2006-01-24 23:17:00 | |
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| acro.r.obat1c meme-m.issle #1721.72b | |
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sponsor.com
cuo-ALITY logo dezzzign.com, hatz, hatz ,erflekempst adverting.biz guerilla marketing campaign.com LOL U LOOKED TELL UR FRIENDZ!#!post post-mortem please help riced out yugo by filling in this convenient questionaire 1. how would you rate your wtf experience at riced out yugo? 2. a+++? +5 Insightful? -2 Troll? wat? (overall score: 3216)? 3. do you currently own a bootleg mackrel demarkating unit (SEE DEFINED BELOW)* 4. did you know that owning can a a bootleg mackrel demarkating unit can statisticly increase your chances of living? * a bootleg mackrel demarkating unit is a unit that demarkates bootleg mackrels. they statisticly increase your chances of living.THANK YOU FOR QUIZZINGthis quiz sponsored by bootlegmackreldemarkatingunits.com BY READING THIS POST YOU SUBMIT TO THE FOLLOWING LEGAL AGREEMENT: - everyone owes me $5 and they'd better pay up, the fuckers |
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2006-01-24 23:01:00 | |
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| Processor lineage | |
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research assistance provided by SOH#2361.
8088 - we liek 8 8086 - we're not so hot on 8 any more 80186 - above the chicken 80286 - twice, above the chicken (16 ISA compatable) 80386sx - now with increased bits 80386dx - now with cop rocessor 80486 - can actually run windows Pentium - management realizes people can't remember numbers, assumes FDIV error is okay Pentium Pro: management decides Intel needs to appear more marketable to professionals, because they all use Suns and SGIs at this point due to their abilities to actually calculate correctly Pentium II: management changes their mind about people not remembering numbers Pentium III: the revenge Pentium IV: we should have stopped at III Pentium Xeon: Brought to you by the international conspiracy of aliens from Andromeda and Rambus (tm) (r) (patent no. 21516161) Pentium M: management realizes individual letters exist Pentium ____: now in macs |
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2006-01-22 20:34:00 | |
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| Business analysis of the greasepots. | |
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The dandruff control industries have taken a big hit this fifth. Business models for the next ten years are wearing bikinis. THIS is NOT a TEST! Warground policies determine underpit shares. Shareholders are running thinsliced meats v.67 alfalfa. carriage bolt, hangar bolt, anchor bolt, sheet metal screw, tin caps, rebar, joist-hanger nails, 10" spikes, 1" plasticap nails, 3/4" copper pipe (10' joint), marriage license, toilet seat VBR40, Jumbo-Tex, aspen chips, stump remover, SW40. |
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| Posted by wolf530 (analog hacker extraordinaire) @ 2006-01-22 04:47:00 | |
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| dr. ted's patent perscription of syllabic shuffle | |
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dr. ted's (1) have the solution for you!! perscription val!1iax delight sensation easy
ref.in.an.c.e.. you now w/ adfadf futz and here comes the kick drum (1)patent appendicitus |
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2006-01-21 20:53:00 | |
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| hi | |
i'm happy to be here, and i'll be here all night.
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2006-01-21 20:14:00 | |
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| NEW MAGI-ZINE | |
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Wat Weekly: Your Weekly Source for AFORMENTIONED QUAX^3 & KNIVERy
Wat Weekly: Overusing the letter X since 1655 Wat Weekly: We've eaten more people than Pat Sajak Wat Weekly: We put "X" in Wat...oh wait. Wat Weekly: They said that we were dadaists, so we wood paneled our cars to achieve the 1980's look, then had a nice glass of Wat? Wat Weekly: Dude, look at my haaaaaaaaands. Wat Weekly: When the Foo Fighters asked for more Foo, we said Bar! Wat Weekly: Give us your money, because we killed Jesus. Wat Weekly: Once a week for good bowel health Wat Weekly: A proverbial beacon for your alarm clock sampling ass Wat Weekly: Fine purveyors of pages that smell like moldy jute Wat Weekly: Quick note to our American readers, HAHAHAHAAHAHHA @ U!! Wat Weekly: We never took the Kelvin Scale seriously, anyway Wat Weekly: Reading this will make your face scruntch-up in twax amazle. Wat Weekly: Makes a fine rope! Wat Weekly: Improved horoscopes for your grandma |
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| Posted by Supporter of Ham #2361 @ 2006-01-20 23:39:00 | |
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| ENTROPY DETERIORATION FAILURE | |
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Mr. The Plague: You are not unheard of around these parts T: ? Mr. The Plague: max flaps, hissss Mr. The Plague: do you remember when Mr. The Plague: obviously you do not T: . . . Mr. The Plague: Like I said. Mr. The Plague: You do not. T: Remind me? Mr. The Plague: let me assure you that it was wonderful Mr. The Plague: and will always be remembered in the annals of history that all has failed Mr. The Plague: failed gloriously and with hats Mr. The Plague: the situation did not degrade gracfeully from there, no it did not T: . . . Mr. The Plague: and this, ladies and women, is why 2006 won't be like 1984. T: Is it possible for you to have even one normal conversation? :P Mr. The Plague: the 10*10^6 monetary unit question Mr. The Plague: What do you think? T: I think it is, but you choose not to. T: :P Mr. The Plague: Enlighten me with the shining light of your wisdom Mr. The Plague: You are incorrect. T: Aww. Mr. The Plague: I can prove it via induction Mr. The Plague: And you cannot disprove T: I'm listening? =^^= Mr. The Plague: it was the worst of times, and it was the even worst of times. Mr. The Plague: Therefore, for all worst greater than 1, worst+1 = worst+1+1, QED, bitch. T: Impressive. Mr. The Plague: this is an important convention in LITHP programming Mr. The Plague: you better pay attention or you will recieve an L in the course and forfiet your credit hours T: Aww. Mr. The Plague: Wait till you see the system console print out 'panic kernel mode interrupt', don't come crying on my shoulder, mkay ***Mr. The Plague cackles evilly Mr. The Plague: I should find a vulnerability in every program you use, just to be irritating Mr. The Plague: especially fuzzball muck and/or tinyfugue Mr. The Plague: oooh that would be so much fun Mr. The Plague: Last time Lumpy spammed furrymuck, it crashed with a segmentation violation. wrote Mr. The Plague: Microwave/toaster yiff Mr. The Plague: I know what you're thinking Mr. The Plague: You're thinking 'has pi jumped off the deep end' Mr. The Plague: huh Mr. The Plague: do you feel lucky T: I do. Mr. The Plague: WRONG Mr. The Plague: Must pass the Treasury Enforcement Agent. Mr. The Plague: oh yes, yes I must Mr. The Plague: oh so much fun Mr. The Plague: Dave, are you still there? Dave? What are you doing, Dave? Mr. The Plague: HAL 9000 (O) T: . . . Mr. The Plague: What's he gonna do next? The suspense is killing you! Mr. The Plague: Is he going to suddenly snap and become vaguely coherent agian? Mr. The Plague: Probably not! Mr. The Plague: Welcome to bantown T: Heheh. Mr. The Plague: This is not a laughing matter, cocksmoker Mr. The Plague: this is serious Mr. The Plague: Good morning Mr. The Plague: I have woken up nice and refreshed. Mr. The Plague: We feel like Trelane, from Q Squared. Mr. The Plague: Have you read Q Squared? Mr. The Plague: Let me summarize Trelane for you. Mr. The Plague: He has touched the Heart of the Storm; chaos left over from the beginning of the universe. Mr. The Plague: And gains the ability to collapse the boundaries between paralell time tracks. Mr. The Plague: Can you see why I feel like Trelane? Mr. The Plague: Can you relate to who I can relate to? Mr. The Plague: .... Your hearing isn't too good. Maybe you should take off your glasses. T: Maybe. Mr. The Plague: Are all of you this numb to the world? Mr. The Plague: I know only one or two of me is. Mr. The Plague: You are probably one of those normal people who only are one Mr. The Plague: but I are many. Mr. The Plague: The jury is out on whether or not this is a feature or a disadvantage. Mr. The Plague: So many of us think it's a feature, so few of me are opposed. Mr. The Plague: Have I sufficiently alienated yet intrigued you, or should I be more sufficient? T: Heheh. Mr. The Plague: THIS IS A DUPE, CMDR TACO Mr. The Plague: (00:03:41) T: Heheh. Mr. The Plague: (00:12:51) T: Heheh. Mr. The Plague: Stupid editors T: Indeed. Mr. The Plague: OMG GOATSE FIRST POST TROLL DONT CLICK!!11 Mr. The Plague: Well, sombrero. Mr. The Plague: Time to HAT the HAT HAT if you HAT my HAT. Mr. The Plague: Why are you coming back with single-word replies Mr. The Plague: Just think T: Because there's not much else to say. Mr. The Plague: I have pushed millions of electrons down channels in my brain in order to bring you these words Mr. The Plague: and you treat them like they are a mere oddity Mr. The Plague: when you should be looking deeper Mr. The Plague: This tragic feeling of having turned gold to stone Mr. The Plague: does it not intrigue? inspire? illuminate? Mr. The Plague: Or should it just Mr. The Plague: go away? Mr. The Plague: JanetRDanceParty? Mr. The Plague: Hm? Mr. The Plague: All the effort, all the time Mr. The Plague: thrown away for one word replies T: Perhaps, perhaps not. Mr. The Plague: I haven't seen a damned thing to indicate othrwise T: What would you like to see? Mr. The Plague: I don't know Mr. The Plague: that's up to you Mr. The Plague: recursion, contradiction, elephants. Mr. The Plague: Good, isn't it? Mr. The Plague: see Mr. The Plague: herein lies the final phenomenon of deterioration. T: Yes . . . ? Mr. The Plague: You want to know what I want, so you can give it to me, right Mr. The Plague: Life doesn't work like that Mr. The Plague: I can see what you don't want people to see Mr. The Plague: and it's all because Mr. The Plague: of one word ***Mr. The Plague cackles T: That's not quite what I want. Mr. The Plague: maniacally, in fact T: And what's that word? Mr. The Plague: I can sense you are feigning interest Mr. The Plague: perhaps that is what you think I want? Mr. The Plague: You still haven't gotten it, have you? Mr. The Plague: Marvelous, really Mr. The Plague: almost beautiful in a sickening way Mr. The Plague: I am ensickened. Mr. The Plague: The barriers between two universes Mr. The Plague: so fragile Mr. The Plague: yet so resilient Mr. The Plague: I am amused at the ease of which we can transfer between. Mr. The Plague: and the minute effort it takes to rend T: :: smiles a bit :: Mr. The Plague: do I amuse you T: Yes. Very much, actually. You spit out seemingly utterly random things, yet, when I read them and think about them, there's usually some overbearing idea being expressed that has genuine merit. Mr. The Plague: Then you miss the point of the exercise Mr. The Plague: DISSONANCE Mr. The Plague: ENTROPY Mr. The Plague: DETERIORATION T: You still intrigue m. T: me& Mr. The Plague: Obviously not. Mr. The Plague: How can you stand there and deny it T: I'm good at it. Mr. The Plague: Not very T: Sorry. I'll try to do better. Mr. The Plague: I could give a shit T: For now, though, I need to go to sleep. I miss hanging out with you, sweetheart. I actually do mean that. Mr. The Plague: I'm sure. Mr. The Plague: have a nice nap T: :: smiles and shrugs :: . . . all I can do is tell you the truth. Belief or disbelief lies with you. Mr. The Plague: You did not witness the cosmic meltdown? Mr. The Plague: It was a glorious event Mr. The Plague: let me assure you that it was wonderful T: Ok. Mr. The Plague: this only goes to show Mr. The Plague: that you did indeed not remember Mr. The Plague: And we find myself back at square one, as it were. T: Or perhaps I just don't know specifically what you're referring to. Mr. The Plague: English needs better words for pluralized singulars. Mr. The Plague: This "I" bullshit doesn't cut it for us. Mr. The Plague: You don't know 'specifically' what I'm referring to? Mr. The Plague: I have not referred to anything specific Mr. The Plague: that's the beauty of it T: I don't seem to find myself off-the-bat assuming that I have influenced anything in any way at all. So, if it has to do with something I did, then I'm going to not figure it out. T: Anyway. Bed. Mr. The Plague: hahahhaha |
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| Posted by ...my name. is. THE PLAGUE @ 2006-01-20 01:48:00 | |
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| 800-4-NOUGAT | |
| nougat nougat inc., nougat-to-nougat nougat sales, this is ki, your nougat representative, how many i help you with nougat??? | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2006-01-19 21:28:00 | |
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| NETWORK SUCK INJECTORS | |
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HAX Brand Network Suck Injectors provide 100% Patented FUCKSUCK technology. For when your connection is just *too* reliable, or for a great pranke against your worst enemy, double up on a few! Endorsed by these and Major technology companies:
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| Posted by ...my name. is. THE PLAGUE @ 2006-01-18 20:44:00 | |
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| turbozeppelin | |
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so, the little lepprechaun had convined us to go to somewhere called "clownhenge," instead of stonehenge, because he had adamantly insisted it infinitely more majestic... and we only relented when he said he'd take us to stonehenge if we didn't agree.
We appeared, and there it was... a bunch of rocks shaped like novelty clowns, except huge. It was like the less admirable aspects of the state of texas, mated with some sort of freaky Disneyland (tm) (r) (c) (pwn) clown land. I stood to face the lepprechaun, and fuckle stood behind him so he didn't escape. "Take us to Stonehenge at once!" I yelled. "yes!1~!" fuckle said, "we payd u $50 wtf asshol!!!!!" The lepprechaun seemed to wince at fuckle's !! level. "Well, uh, err..." he said. Then, he seemed to make up his mind. "Well, okay." And he did. |
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2006-01-18 18:55:00 | |
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| QUIT IT! QUIT IT! QUIT IT! | |
| pickle juice lawn ordination. Tilde army will unite and overtake the rest of the keyboard. Mainly the Tab, caps lock, 123 and qwa areas. Be on high alert for tilde advancement. | |
| Posted by Supporter of Ham #2361 @ 2006-01-18 13:35:00 | |
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| post per million ratio | |
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1 megahax is 2083.9281983 yugo, 5 yugo is exactly pi nanoradians per megahax: the recursive definition of pi santa is a fractal proof: covering earth in 1 night during timezone shifts. Enzo rebooted into damzel in distress, but bob khax megadot thought :( Awesome video show, The Pope should make more! ATTN: I AM NOW POSTING OT-3 ALL SCIENTOLOGISTS SHOULD G OH SHIT CANT STOP HITTING POST: he head of the Galactic Confederation (76 planets around larger stars visible from here) (founded 95,000,000 yrs ago, very space opera) solved overpopulation (250 billion or so per planet) -- 178 billion average) by mass implanting. He caused people to be brought to Teegeeack (Earth) and put an H Bomb on the principal volcanoes (Incident 2) and then the Pacific area ones were taken in boxes to Hawaii and the Atlantic Area ones to Las Palmas and there "packaged." His name was Xenu. He used renegades. Various misleading data by means of circuits etc. were placed in the implants. When through with his crime Loyal Officers (to the people) captured him after 6 years of battle and put him in an electronic mountain trap where he still is. "They" are gone. The place (Confed.) has since been a desert. |
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| Posted by ...my name. is. THE PLAGUE @ 2006-01-16 20:56:00 | |
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| big bombastic beats to make you dizzyq | |
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it's time!!
virus khax we'll bring the house down!! big bombastic beats to make you dizzy hi who r u .... wat wat wat wat wat wat!!! we'll wat teh wat wat wat pope john paul benedict IVIVIVIVX allocates suparmalarkey interconnection grid matrix v. 2.105. bishop RTQP commits CARDINAL HAX!!! +3 dmg. can you handle it? only if you can handle HAX INTERCEPTION!!! guitar interrupt vector: big beat 31k sponsored by beatz |
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2006-01-16 01:42:00 | |
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| malarkey interconnection is a cretenos phelg | |
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failed blam cycles to date:
- wireless wonkette - ampaire ecclair - resonance turbulance - relaxing fig loaf |
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| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2006-01-10 16:29:00 | |
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| important announcement | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2006-01-09 20:25:00 | |
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| blatzfink 97k | |
| compressable polygons - delivered in mail for advertising benefit. out of envelope, POP! goes the polygon. designed by engineers (tm). | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2006-01-08 08:35:00 | |
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| deli selects and the assasination of the american character | |
| disparate delis. hammered hams. crammed clams. stuffed stuffing. pork-infused pork. advertising for advertising. operating system operating system. friends of Friends. the character of characters. the morality of morality. what does "is" mean? | |
| Posted by Reverend Tedward Q. Porktanker @ 2006-01-07 17:44:00 | |
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